Last Updated on December 8, 2024 by Kittredge Cherry
I create my own queer Nativity scenes for the Christmas season. One has two Marys at the manger with the baby Jesus, and the other features two Josephs with the Christ child.
I put Mary with Mary and Joseph with Joseph—just like putting two brides or two grooms on top of a wedding cake!
My lesbian and gay Nativity scenes are photographed in two settings: Out in nature — and the more popular version with Christmas decorations, including the Harlequin Great Dane coming out of a gingerbread house. In that version, the Marys seem to ignore the baby Jesus while looking sideways at the dog.
Obviously this is not about historical accuracy, but I believe my queer Nativity scenes are true to the spirit of the Christmas story in the Bible: God’s child conceived in an extraordinary way and born into disreputable circumstances.
Love makes a family—including the Holy Family.
Go ahead and imagine that Jesus has two mommies. According to the Bible story, Joseph was an adoptive father anyway. It makes theological sense because Jesus can be said to have two mommies: Mary and the Holy Spirit, who is often described as female in traditional Christianity. And he had two daddies: Joseph and God the Father, the male creator of Christian tradition.
Gay and lesbian Nativity scene from the “Love Makes a Holy Family” series by Kittredge Cherry
The Virgin Mary had Jesus without sex with a man, much like lesbian mothers who use artificial insemination. The standard Nativity scene contains many historical errors anyway. For example, the Bible doesn’t mention animals being present, the Holy Family was not white, a midwife was probably present and the shepherds visited the baby Jesus long before the magi arrived.
I also filmed a video about my gay and lesbian manger scenes. I even made them available as Christmas cards and ornaments.
New in 2024: “A Gay in a Manger” banned
British retail chain Debenhams removed its controversial “A Gay in a Manger” sweaters and mugs after a 2024 public outcry from Christian conservatives who attacked it as “blasphemous,” “evil” and “insulting.” However the shirts resurfaced online and are currently available from several shops on Amazon (click here or here for Amazon versions).
“A Gay in a Manger” design. Shirts with the design were officially banned, but are still available here or here,
Inspired by the Christmas carol “Away in a Manger,” the design shows a rainbow shining out of the manger, implying that the baby Jesus is queer. The design was created by alternative clothing brand Grindstore. International news reports covered the controversy.
I got the idea for queering the Nativity in 2008
I first got the idea for queering the crèche when I heard that a gay and lesbian Nativity scene was planned for the 2008 “Pink Christmas” festival in Amsterdam. Live actors were supposed to play a pair of Marys and a pair of Josephs. I had my own lesbian Christian spiritual awakening while waiting for the event.
I remembered going to a huge exhibit of Nativity scenes back when I was a young lesbian in seminary. They had hundreds of statues of Mary, Joseph and baby portrayed as every conceivable racial and ethnic identity. Not once did I consider that my own community was missing—there was no same-sex version with Mary and another woman. Nor was there a gay version with Joseph and another man.
Looking back some 20 years later, it finally occurred to me that LGBTQ families should be represented in the mix. I had a personal breakthrough as I realized that my mind was still trapped in heterosexual assumptions about the cast of characters at Jesus’ birth.
I imagined that the Amsterdam LGBTQ community would enact Nativity scenes of loving lesbian and gay families like those that I have known.
Scenes of a lesbian Madonna and her female partner with the baby Jesus have been created by artists such as Elisabeth Ohlson Wallin of Sweden and Becki Jayne Harrelson of Atlanta. But this was the first time that I’ve seen a gay Joseph and his male partner with the Christ child.
As feminist author Angela Yarber writes, “If we take this a step further, borrowing from feminist theology and boldly claiming that God is a She, then we queer the Christmas narrative even further. Mary and She Who Is (God) brought Jesus into the world. Jesus had two moms!”
The Pink Christmas event turned out to be a disappointment to me. It featured a drag queen and a leather daddy who seemed like a parody of themselves, with no loving “family” connection to each other whatsoever. You can read my thoughts about the event in my previous post “Can you imagine? A gay Nativity scene.”
Fortunately, the Amsterdam event planted the idea in my mind for making the manger scene my own as a lesbian Christian. I bought two Nativity sets and let the Holy Spirit guide me.
Gay Nativity with dog from the “Love Makes a Holy Family” by Kittredge Cherry
I feel more connected to God every time I look at the loving lesbian and gay manger scenes in our living room. My partner and I even toyed with the idea of getting two sets of Nativity lawn decorations and turning our yard into a big old queer Christmas display. Maybe next year!
I also invite others to make their own queer Nativity scenes.
Rearranging the Holy Family is not as simple as it seems. A few androgynous manger scenes are on the market. But if you want to create your own queer creche, be sure to buy a set with freestanding figures. In many cases Mary, Joseph and Jesus are wedded together in one inseparable, three-headed blob. What does that say about our attachment to idealized, sanctified heterosexuality? Unfortunately the only stand-alone figures that fit my budget had white skin.
When you find freestanding figures, just get two standard Nativity sets, then mix and match. Please send me a photo of your creations to share the joy. I’d love to see dark-skinned and inter-racial queer couples too.
Everyone should be able to see themselves in the Christmas story, including the growing number of LGBTQ parents and their children.
Queer Nativity controversies erupt almost every year
Controversy erupts over a queer Nativity scene almost every year at Christmastime.
In 2023 an Italian church’s Nativity scene of Jesus with two mothers was heavily criticized in the news as blasphemous. Vitaliano Della Sala, priest at the Church of Saints Peter and Paul in Capocastello di Mercogliano, Italy, defended it by saying that the church welcomes all non-traditional families.
Screenshot from “Italian priest defends same-sex nativity scene,” a video by Reuters, Dec. 23, 2023
In 2017 the debate focused on a semi-naked man in a Vatican Nativity and two pink-robed Josephs set up as lawn ornaments with the baby Jesus in a Los Angeles yard.
Critics attacked the gay implications of a Nativity scene at St. Peter’s Square in the Vatican December 2017. They blasted it as “sacrilegious,” “fiendish” and “a lobbying tool for the homosexual rights movement.” The innovative Nativity shows a semi-naked man to illustrate the charitable act of clothing the naked. It was donated by the Abbey of Montevergine, which has special significance to the LGBTQ community. According to legend, the Madonna of Montevergine miraculously freed a homosexual couple after they were tied to a tree and left to die the winter of 1256. Pros and cons are presented in the new reports reports such as:
Pro: Is this the gayest nativity scene ever created by the Vatican? (gaystarnews.com)
Anti: “Vatican’s ‘sexually suggestive’ nativity has troubling ties to Italy’s LGBT activists.” (lifesitenews.com)
Meanwhile a tweet about it from queer comedian Cameron Esposito quickly went viral in 2017. It generated a flood of positive and negative comments and news reports.
This gay Nativity scene appeared in the yard of a California in 2017. A bishop denounced it as “sacrilege” and an “attack on the Christian faith.”
A baby Jesus has a rainbow halo on a billboard that caused controversy in New Zealand in 2012.
A 2011 attack on a gay and lesbian Nativity scene at a California church was investigated as a hate crime by police. Vandals knocked over the same-sex couples in a manger scene at Claremont United Methodist Church in Claremont, CA, doing $3,000 in damage. The destruction proves the ongoing need for religious images that affirm LGBTQ people.
The Claremont church dared to re-imagine the Nativity scene as three couples — gay, lesbian and heterosexual. They stood on the church lawn in life-sized silhouettes built from 600-pound light boxes. Each pair held hands beneath the star of Bethlehem. The words “Christ is born” blazed above them. There was no baby Jesus, but a small tree of life grew atop a statement pointing out that “Christ was the victim of hate and intolerance while he taught love and compassion.” After the attack, only the straight couple was left standing. For more info, see my previous article Hate crime targets gay and lesbian Nativity scene at Claremont church.
Lesbian and gay Nativity scene from Claremont Methodist Church in California
People love or hate Q Spirit’s Nativity scenes
My queer Nativity images made international news in 2016 when the British group Christian Concern attacked them as a “blasphemous attempt to rewrite the Christmas story.” Sample news coverage:
Christian campaign group slam a gay tree ornament showing a nativity scene with two JOSEPHS (Daily Mail)
Christians Slam Gay Nativity Scene, Media Overlook Backstory (Newsbusters.org)
Gay and lesbian Nativity ornaments
After some on-again, off-again complications, the Zazzle store for Q Spirit / Jesus in Love is now offering gay Nativity ornaments and lesbian Nativity ornaments.
Two of my queer Nativity scenes are included in “‘Tis the season for everyone to get mad about queer nativity scenes,” a humorous list of favorite LGBTQ+ manger scenes by Heather Dockray at Mashable. She writes:
“Every Christmas, I look forward to one thing and one thing only: nativity drama.
There’s nothing more petty and more pure…. I’m particularly thankful for America’s rich history of queer nativity scenes, which manage to incense the worst people on the internet every few years or so. What a blessing.”
My scenes appear on the lighthearted list as:
3. The same-sex Joseph couple and their giant purebred dog
and
4. Two Marys and the little baby Jesus, whose head should really be supported right now
Links related to queer Nativity scenes
Conservative bloggers attacked my lesbian and gay Nativity scenes (2011)
Gay baby Jesus comes out on Christmas billboard (New Zealand, 2012)
Gay Nativity scene in Columbia sparks outrage (2012)
Blasphemy debate on queer Nativity at Believe Out Loud on Facebook (2013) (more than 135 comments!)
Queer Nativity makes international news after conservative attack (2016)
Is this the gayest nativity scene ever created by the Vatican? (2017)
Bishop Calls Nativity Scene with Two St. Joseph’s an “Attack on Christian Faith” (New Ways Ministry, 2017)
‘Blasphemous’ same-sex nativity scene angers conservatives in Italy (2023)
Queer Nativity contest (7 artists) (sponsored by Kittredge Cherry in 2011)
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Top image credit:
Lesbian Nativity with dog from the “Love Makes a Holy Family” series by Q Spirit founder Kittredge Cherry.
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This post is part of the LGBTQ Calendar series by Kittredge Cherry. The series celebrates religious and spiritual holidays, events in LGBTQ history, holy days, feast days, festivals, anniversaries, liturgical seasons and other occasions of special interest to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people of faith and our allies.
This article was originally published on the Jesus in Love Blog in December 2009, was re-posted at Q Spirit in December 2016, and was most recently updated on Dec. 8, 2024.
Copyright © Kittredge Cherry. All rights reserved.
Qspirit.net presents the Jesus in Love Blog on LGBTQ spirituality.
Hi Kittredge Cherry,
I really liked your article about 2 Mary’s and two Joseph’s at the manger instead of the typical Mary and Joseph. I hope you are able to put up a Queer nativity in your yard someday and I hope it doesn’t get vandalized.
Loved this article! I’m a decades long lgbtq ally and confess, I never thought about the “cast of characters” in Jesus’ birth story. I regularly use “mother God” and am a member of an Ooen and Affirming UCC congregation that invites congregants to use “Our Mother/Father” every Sunday for the Lord’s Prayer…and in sermons, responsive readings, etc., pronouns and referents are varied as well, including, “sisters, brothers, non-binary/queer siblings in Christ”. A Hallmark store near me closed last year and I purchased their global diversity individual, stand-alone wood figurine “My First Nativity” set. boxed set because I like it and I paid just $10. The set can still be purchased on eBay at a higher price – so I’m buying one to make my own queer nativity scenes! I’ve sent your article to lgbtq friends and my pastor. This morning was Epiphany Sunday and my church hands a cut out paper star with a “star word” on it (they’re all different). It’s a tradition – the word given to you (its a surprise – whatever the pastor pulls out of the basket and hands to you) is your “star word” for the entire year. The next year, you get a new star word (words like: rest, reconciliation, reflect, believe, joy, faith, peace, etc). My word for this year is “imagine” and the word “imagine” took on new meaning when I saw it in this article. Thanks so much for spiritually gifting all of us!
I am impressed and uplifted by your enthusiasm for my article on queer Nativity scenes. I’d love to see a photo of the queer Nativity scenes that you make. May God bless you and all the ways that you are making God more accessible to same-sex couples and gender diversity! I hope you continue to “imagine” holiness in new ways all year long!